Our Staff
We are proud, sort of, to introduce the staff of Moose Business Dot Com. However, because we are a tremendously large corporation, with more employees than we can keep up with, this is an abbreviated list. Please check back frequently, as we tend to have a revolving door policy with a great turnover.
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Who: Iris Fender, PhD.
Education: Dr. Fender has a doctorate degree in Finance from Princeton.
Hobbies: He enjoys fishing, kite flying and handball.
Contributions & Accomplishments: Dr. Fender has created our patented MooseBooks program to keep track of all our orders, inventory, taxes, non-profit charity expenditures and entertainment expenses.
Personal: Dr. Fender once road a unicycle from New Jersey to Palm Springs, June 1981. He was hospitalized for six months with head cramps. Also, he has three children, one of each.
Favorite quotation: “Love knows no bounds, but it can create a rash if you’re not careful.”
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Who: Millie Tenderleaf, MBA, PharmD, MD, PhD
Education: Dr. Tenderleaf attended Vassar and Brandeis universities. She holds a medical degree from Harvard and a PhD from Yale.
Hobbies: Dr. Tenderleaf enjoys “anything to do with spying.”
Contributions & Accomplishments: Dr. Tenderleaf was instrumental in curbing an outbreak of hives in the lunchroom in 1999 by spraying the food down with an industrial size drum of Benadryl. She also can play the flute, oboe and bird whistle.
Personal: Dr. Tenderleaf secretly longs to dance on television.
Quotation: “Dancing is in my genes. In fact, I invented a lab test for this. One day I want to dance on one of the television talent shows just to prove to my father that I could have been a wonderful partner for Gene Kelly if he was still alive.”
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Who: Alex Buffer, BS
Education: Mr. Buffer has a bachelor of science degree in Information Management from University of Florida.
Hobbies: He enjoys making drapes. His great grandfather, Max Buffer, was known as The Gabardine Guru of Lodz.
Contributions & Accomplishments: Mr. Buffer is in charge of all mail room operations. He also organizes the yearly Spiceman Awards for those who come up with the most unique spice combinations.
Personal: Mr. Buffer is married with one child, Edmond, a gifted scholar attending the Medley School of Mines. His wife, Altuna, is a violinist with the Miami Swimming Club. They play for the swimmers as they practice.
Favorite quotation: “I sleep with silky fabrics.”
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Who: Hector Victorovich Shaneski, PhD.
Education: Dr. Victorovich has a doctorate degree in Astrophysics and Molecular Biology from University of Minsk.
Hobbies: Dr. Victorovich enjoys making model spaceships out of peanut brittle.
Contributions & Accomplishments: Dr. Victorovich for the past twelve years has represented our Corporation in 27 law suits involving malfunctioning devices. He was six times awarded the Moose Facilitation Award, providing service over and beyond the call of his office. His intimate knowledge of anything containing cogs and levers earns him a seven-figure salary.
Personal: Dr. Victorovich resides in his home on the Caspian Sea during the summer months, and in the winter he has a home in Weston, Florida where he enjoys sailboating, plankton fishing, dolphin communications, and attaching homing devices to box turtles. He loves Woody Allen films.
Quotation: “Woody Allen is the kind of genius I wish I was. His comic timing and ability to make a really good club sandwich will always keep him as a hero in my notebook.”
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Who: Meeve Adams, Sr., JP, USD, JD, PhD
Education: Dr. Adams was graduated from the University of Miami several times. His most notable degree is in Advanced Marketing Applications, for which he was awarded his Doctorate Degree.
Hobbies: Dr. Adams enjoys tennis, walking his dog, ironing, and eating tuna sandwiches.
Contributions & Accomplishments: Dr. Adams is known for his innovations that are too numerous to mention. He created the Memo System, the Charity Department, Chinese for English Speakers, the Annual Darts for Dollars program, Staplers for Sisters (a program bringing high quality office equipment to convents in the Caribbean), Just Say Whoa, Judo for Octogenarians, Sliding Fish Program, The Cuzzie Foundation, The Automated Remote Control Cuzzie Flicker, The Doctor Avigdor Flinsky Day Parade, Laugh Your Beak Off Corporate-wide Contest, and the coveted Lou Heilberg Summer Camp.
Personal: Dr. Adams reads sixteen books a week. He has a contagious laugh that once put one of our principals in a ship’s sick bay.
Favorite quotation: “Never try to pull a wet Tshirt over your head without thinking you’re not in for a rough go of it.”
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Who: Amy Flanders
Education: Journalism and Communications, Bachelor’s Degree, University of Florida
Hobbies: Poetry for Children, Animal Rights Activist, Women’s Jumpstyle Dance Competitor
Contributions & Accomplishments: Amy travels around the world to cover corporate news.
Personal: Amy once travelled with Greenpeace and was onboard its vessel when fired upon by a Japanese tuna trawler. Amy was thrown into the sea and later retrieved by a Greek fishing vessel. She was crowned Miss Athens of the Sea then thrown back into the water (part of the ceremony).
Favorite Quotation: “It’s good to trust others but, not to do so is much better.” — Benito Mussolini, April 28, 1945